Cape Town and Johannesburg — The Final Destination


“Go hard or go home” is how the saying goes. Well, I’ll go hard and then go home.

South Africa will be the last country on my upcoming journey after Spain and Morocco. It’s part of the new cultural exchange between the U.S. and South Africa. America gets South African comedian Trevor Noah to host The Daily Show and South Africa will get me — an ambassador of fun, positivity and dopeness. Everybody wins.

Heading to the other end of South Africa seems like a logical destination after Morocco. It’s going to be a bitch to fly to but it’s going to worth it. Plus, I am awash in Virgin Atlantic miles and I’ll able to fly back to New York via London on miles in Upper Class, like a real baller.

The more I read up on both cities, the more excited I get. I’ll be able to see the “Big Five” (lion,  elephant, buffalo, leopard and rhinoceros) in both cities in nearby nature preserves and national parks. There’s penguins on the friggin’ beach in Cape Town!

Now that asshole tourist Walter Palmer has gone back to work and his costume is a big seller for Halloween, I want to show the African people that we are not blood thirsty, gun-toting wackadoodles. I come to respect the wildlife and will document with my Canon DSLR. Not to get too political and sociological, but sometimes travel can make a statement.

Then there’s the historical landmarks tied to the turbulent 20th century with apartheid. You can spend full days going to sites focused around Nelson Mandela. I’m looking forward to Robben Island, where Mandela was imprisoned and biking through Soweto, where he grew up.

district-9I’m hoping that a bike ride through District 9 in Johannesburg will be incident free. You saw the documentary, that place is hardcore. Speaking of hardcore, like in hardcore awful, I saw CHAPPiE and somebody needs to go down there and yell at Neill Blomkamp for that piece of crap.

Finally, lets not forget the wine, which is mighty tasty and plentiful. I’ll be definitely getting out to some wineries outside the cities. Within the city, the food and beer scene in both cities have come into it’s own. Braai is South African BBQ, so expect a lot of #nofilter photos of that goodness.

Four days in CT and four in Joberg, then they will ship my bloated body back to Newark.

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