Tourist Hell — The Little Mermaid, Copenhagen

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Yeah, look at the mermaid … doing mermaid things on that rock. Yup, just hanging out on the rock.

In the world of tourist attractions, statues seem to pop up in various locals. Ohhhh, you’re in New York, you gotta go see the Statue of Liberty. Ohhhh, you’re in Florence, you gotta go see the Statue of David. Ohhh, you’re in Tokyo, you gotta go see the statue of Hachikō.

Then you have The Little Mermaid statue in Copenhagen, easily the most un-enthralling statue you’ll come across. The second being the Manneken-Pis in Brussels (that’s another Tourist Hell post). Siting off Langelinie path, the Hans Christian Andersen character has perched on the rock since 1913. That’s over a century of lame selfies.

Everybody’s reaction is the same when they get to the statue, it’s so small.

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I have this observation about public statues of women — eventually everyone will grab the statue’s boobs. I’ve seen it in Verona and Dublin, a faded boob from the years of people rubbing it. In the Mermaid’s case, you have to climb up that thing and hope nobody yells at you. In my case, there was no way my clumsy ass was climbing down from the pier. I’m good not having a picture her.

Photographically, it’s rather uninspiring, unless you’re luckily enough to visit when it’s been vandalized by political protesters. More than likely, you’re going to have to fight with other tourists to get alone time with the girl. And don’t think you’re the first one trying to pinch your fingers around the statue in your photo.

My advice, don’t go out of your way to see the statue. Copenhagen is the best city in the world for bicycles. Most hotels will rent you one for the day. The area around the Langelinie features public park space, some old military barracks and unusual topography. Take your bike, ride around and if you notice some sign pointing to statue, ride on over.

If you miss it on your trip, you’ll live.

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